Susan Forward Quotes

• Muchos padres tóxicos comparan desfavorablemente a un hermano con otro para hacer sentir al hijo objetivo que no está haciendo lo suficiente para ganarse el afecto paterno. Esto motiva al niño a hacer lo que los padres quieran para recuperar su favor. Esta técnica de divide y vencerás suele desatarse contra los niños que se vuelven un poco demasiado independientes, amenazando el equilibrio del sistema familiar.

  Susan Forward

  Children, Sibling, Independent

  47 Copiar cita

• Los niños a los que no se anima a hacer, a probar, a explorar, a dominar y a arriesgarse a fracasar, suelen sentirse indefensos e inadecuados. Controlados en exceso por padres ansiosos y temerosos, estos niños suelen volverse ansiosos y temerosos ellos mismos. Esto les dificulta madurar. Muchos nunca superan la necesidad de orientación y control continuos por parte de sus padres. Como resultado, sus padres siguen invadiendo, manipulando y, con frecuencia, dominando sus vidas.

  Susan Forward

  Children, Parent, Risk

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• When your lover is a liar, you and he have a lot in common, you're both lying to you!

  Susan Forward

  Liars, Lying, Infidelity

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• If there is one sweeping generalization I can make without fear of contradiction, it is that 'change' is the scariest word in the English language Nothing will change in our lives until we change our own behavior. Insight won't do it. Understanding why we do the self-defeating things we do won't make us stop doing them. Nagging and pleading with the other person to change won't do it. We have to act. We have to take the first step down a new road.

  Susan Forward

  Self, Understanding, Nagging

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• Criticism is the fountainhead of control.

  Susan Forward

  Criticism, Fountainhead

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• Unhealthy families discourage individual expression. Everyone must conform to the thoughts and actions of the toxic parents. They promote fusion, a blurring of personal boundaries, a welding together of family members. On an unconscious level, it is hard for family members to know where one ends and another begins. In their efforts to be close, they often suffocate one another's individuality.

  Susan Forward

  Expression, Effort, Parent

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• Love is a verb, not a noun. It is active. Love is not just feelings of passion and romance. It is behavior. If a man lies to you, he is behaving badly and unlovingly toward you. He is disrespecting you and your relationship. The words “I love you” are not enough to make up for that. Don't kid yourself that they are.

  Susan Forward

  Lying, Love You, Passion

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• Denial is the lid on our emotional pressure cooker: the longer we leave it on, the more pressure we build up. Sooner or later, that pressure is bound to pop the lid, and we have an emotional crisis.

  Susan Forward

  Emotional, Denial, Pressure

  "Toxic Parents". Book by Susan Forward, May 31, 2010.

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• Successful adult relationships, whether between lovers or
  friends, require a significant degree of vulnerability, trust,
  and openness-

  Susan Forward

  Successful, Adults, Degrees

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• Love is a verb, not a noun. It is active. Love is not just feelings of passion and romance. It is behavior.

  Susan Forward

  Passion, Love Is, Romance

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• Love involves more than just feelings. It is also a way of behaving. When Sandy said, "My parents don't know how to love me," she was saying that they don't know how to behave in loving ways. If you were to ask Sandy's parents, or almost any other toxic parents, if they love their children, most of them would answer emphatically that they do. Yet, sadly, most of their children have always felt unloved. What toxic parents call "love" rarely translates into nourishing, comforting behavior.

  Susan Forward

  Children, Healing, Parent

  6 Copiar cita

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