David Cross Quotes - Page 2

• Go back and read Sinclair Lewis - It Can't Happen Here or Babbitt. For a guy or girl who's going to do an hour of political comedy, it might be a little rough, sure. But I think if you're spending 10 minutes or less, and you're talking about - not necessarily [Donald Trump] but his supporters and the media coverage, there's all kinds of angles to explore. It doesn't just have to be simply, "This guy is crazy!" It's more about the idea of that kind of guy rising to the prominence he has, to actually become the Republican candidate.

  David Cross

  Girl, Crazy, Thinking

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I have always tried to use humor to "help ever" and "hurt never," for I find that to laugh is like swallowing a secret that Santa Claus farted.

  David Cross

  Divertido, Dolor, Humor

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• All my friends are always telling me how hard it is to have kids. 'Oh, David, it's so hard.' That's not hard. I'll tell you what hard is. Try talking your girlfriend into her third consecutive abortion. Yeah, that's hard, that takes finesse. You're just inconvenienced.

  David Cross

  Divertido, Novia, Humor

  "It's Not Funny". Stand-up comedy album by David Cross, November 14, 2004.

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• You have to have some level of attachment, you can still have passion and believe but it has to be softened somewhat.

  David Cross

  Believe, Passion, Attachment

  "David Cross from Arrested Development". Interview with Daniel Robert Epstein, suicidegirls.com. February 1, 2004.

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• High Times magazine is a notch intellectually below Highlights for Children. I mean, they're both great to read when you're baked, but come on, ya know.

  David Cross

  Divertido, Niños, Humor

  "David Cross: The Pride Is Back". TV Special, September 18, 1999.

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• I am against the war, but I do support our white troops. No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I'm not a Republican. I'm not a member of the party of inclusion. Wonderful, tolerant, rational human beings they are.

  David Cross

  Funny, War, Party

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• Lo que está haciendo el presidente de la aerolínea es instar a todo el mundo a ceder sus millas de viajero frecuente para los niños enfermos... Pero mientras leía esto, había dos asientos vacíos a mi lado. ¿Por qué los niños enfermos no pueden sentarse allí? Si tanto les preocupan los niños enfermos, ¿no deberían tener un corral de niños enfermos junto a la puerta de embarque?

  David Cross

  Funny, Giving Up, Reading

  "David Cross: The Pride Is Back". TV Special, September 18, 1999.

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• I do not want to encourage heckling and outbreaks at all.

  David Cross

  Want, Heckling, Outbreaks

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I really don't have a problem with gay marriage... because I'm tolerant and rational.

  David Cross

  Divertido, Humor, Gay

  "Last Laugh '05". TV Movie, December 11, 2005.

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• I stand by everything I said. I absolutely can defend my material, and I take issue with people who say, "It's just shock value. It's not even funny." I disagree. There's different ways to be funny and to be a comedian.

  David Cross

  Issues, People, Comedian

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I was born Jewish, but I am an atheist. I dont believe in God.

  David Cross

  Ateo, Creer, Creer en Dios

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• I went to a bunch of marches in New York and Washington, and you know I believe in the cause, but to march with those people takes a lot of compromise on my end.

  David Cross

  New York, Believe, People

  "Let America Laugh". Interview with Dan Hoyle, www.alternet.org. January 1, 2004.

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• Hopefully people will be reinventing comedy forever and ever. This is just what I do, and it's a type of comedy.

  David Cross

  People, Forever, Comedy

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• You can't just yell jokes at people.

  David Cross

  Divertido, Humor, Gente

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• What happened to our friendship? I really think it's our obligation as friends to be brutally honest and be frank with them and say, 'Look, I'm sorry, but your baby is fking boring.'

  David Cross

  Bebé, Perdón, Pensar

  The Best Fatherhood "Advice (from Comedians)" by Chris Giblin, www.esquire.com. August 28, 2013.

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• I did one of the worst shows for that kind of thing in Northampton, Massachusetts, which is one of the most liberal spots on the planet. There were numerous people who walked out, somebody had thrown a beer, I had people yelling and screaming.

  David Cross

  Beer, Yelling, People

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I know this is obviously biased as well, but in my Twitter feed, on my Facebook, 90 percent are gushing, glowing, "Thank you for doing that" - type of reviews. "It's ballsy, it's honest, it's hilarious" - that kind of stuff. Obviously those are fans.

  David Cross

  Glowing, Stuff, Fans

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• There is nothing interesting about just seeing me doing the show then seeing the fans and how much people love me.

  David Cross

  People, Interesting, Fans

  "David Cross from Arrested Development". Interview with Daniel Robert Epstein, suicidegirls.com. February 1, 2004.

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• Porque has tenido citas en las que te olvidas de abrir los ojos, llevar pantalones y hablar inglés.

  David Cross

  Funny, Humor, Eye

  "David Cross: The Pride Is Back". TV Special, September 18, 1999.

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• Florida was the low point.The entire state, yep. I'm not sure I'd go back.

  David Cross

  Florida, States, Lows

  Fuente: www.avclub.com

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• Creo que para mucha gente es el punto de saturación. Una vez que entras en el tema de [Donald] Trump y los republicanos y los seguidores de Ayn Rand, no se detiene durante media hora. Se vuelve duro y se mantiene duro durante un tiempo.

  David Cross

  Thinking, People, Followers

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I'm directing the Sky show. I'm not going to be in it. I'm just writing and directing it. So that'll satisfy that part of my brain.

  David Cross

  Writing, Sky, Brain

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• Once you get into the [Donald] Trump stuff, you get people going, "I didn't come here to have my political views bashed."

  David Cross

  Views, People, Political

  Fuente: www.avclub.com

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• You have to get the second season by acquiescing to a third season.

  David Cross

  Thirds, Seasons

  Fuente: www.avclub.com

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• [If Donald Trump does get elected, I will be] probably Secretary Of Reeducation. Or I don't know. I'll probably end up working in the cafeteria.

  David Cross

  Doe, Cafeteria, Ends

  Fuente: www.avclub.com

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