Citas de David Cross

• Cuando la Biblia fue escrita, luego editada, luego reescrita, luego reescrita, luego reeditada, luego traducida de lenguas muertas, luego re-traducida, luego editada, luego reescrita, luego entregada a los reyes para que tomaran sus partes favoritas, luego reescrita, luego re-reescrita, luego traducida de nuevo, luego entregada al papa para que la aprobara, luego reescrita, luego editada de nuevo, la re-re-re-re-re-reescrita de nuevo...todo basado en historias que fueron contadas oralmente 30 a 90 años DESPUES de que sucedieran.. a gente que no sabia escribir... asi que...

  David Cross

  Bible, Kings, Writing

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• I like pot, I enjoy pot, I like to smoke it. But, the one thing I don't like about pot is the subculture it's spawned. I think it's embarrassing and really juvenile and uncreative

  David Cross

  Weed, Thinking, Smoking

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• The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny!

  David Cross

  Book, Pages, Firsts

  "Shut Up You Fucking Baby!". Live comedy album by David Cross., November 5, 2002.

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• No se puede ganar una guerra contra el terrorismo. Es como tener una guerra contra los celos.

  David Cross

  Paz, guerra, victoria

  "David Cross: 'At least 25% of America has always been racist, xenophobic and backwards'" by Gareth McLean, www.theguardian.com. April 27, 2016.

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• I'm very vocal about my belief that all religion is garbage. Most of my friends are religious or at least spiritual. These are people I like and I know are intelligent. It's this thing that I carry around. I know I'd be a better person if I was fairer, but it's at the core of who I am and what I believe.

  David Cross

  Espiritual, Religioso, Creer

  Fuente: www.believermag.com

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• In New York, you are constantly faced with this very urgent decision that you have to make, about every twenty minutes...you have to decide, immediately, you have to go "Ohmigod. Do I look at the most beautiful woman in the world or the craziest guy in the world?"

  David Cross

  Funny, Beautiful, New York

  "Shut Up You Fucking Baby!". Live comedy album, November 5, 2002.

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• I'm concerned about organized religion getting away with what it gets away with.

  David Cross

  Get Away, Organized, Concerned

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I do believe that on a whole, women are definitely smarter than men... I also believe that dogs are smarter than women. No? That one, you don't believe it? You believe that I didn't do a series of tests? You are right to not believe it, because I'm going to go ahead and admit that I do not believe what I just said, it was what's described as a 'joke.' Um, I'll be telling a bunch of them here tonight.

  David Cross

  Funny, Dog, Believe

  "It's Not Funny". Stand-up comedy album by David Cross, November 14, 2004.

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• The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country.

  David Cross

  Divertido, País, Humor

  "Shut Up, You Fucking Baby!". Live comedy album by David Cross, November 5, 2002.

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• Hace poco asistí a un mitin pro-droga... en mi sótano.

  David Cross

  Drug, Basements

  5 Copiar cita

• We should just get somebody from the left and the right and they should all throw bumper stickers at each other and the first one to cover the other one wins.

  David Cross

  Winning, Firsts, Bumper Sticker

  "Let America Laugh". Interview with Dan Hoyle / WireTap, www.alternet.org. January 1, 2004.

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• It's a lot of anti-gay, racist humor—which people like in America—all couched in 'I'm telling it like it is.' He's in the right place at the right time for that gee-shucks, proud-to-be-a-redneck, I'm-just-a-straight-shooter-multimillionaire-in-cutoff-flannel-selling-ring-tones act. That's where we are as a nation now. We're in a state of vague American values and anti-intellectual pride.

  David Cross

  Pride, Gay, Redneck

  "David Cross returns to stand-up to make America great again". Interview with Dustin Waters, www.charlestoncitypaper.com. February 24, 2016.

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• I was in Antwerp - which, I had about 20 shows left at that point - and a guy said, "That's Dave Attell's." Also, Antwerp was my smallest audience, so the guy was right there. I was like, "What?" He said, "Dave Attell does a bit about, 'Why are there luggage stores in the airport?'" I had never seen that, and I would never ever, ever, ever - please believe me - I would never lift material from somebody ever, and certainly not knowingly.

  David Cross

  Believe, Airports, Guy

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• Aqua Teen Hunger Force is one of the funniest shows on TV and I was a little intimidated working with those guys 'cause you're in a sound booth by yourself and they're all in a room in Atlanta.

  David Cross

  Atlanta, Aqua, Guy

  "David Cross from Arrested Development". Interview with Daniel Robert Epstein, suicidegirls.com. February 1, 2004.

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• I am truly passionate and concerned about the lack of empathy that people show towards one another.

  David Cross

  People, Empathy, Passionate

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• We get to see it! January 1st, 2000! We get to see... all those fundamentalist preachers having to do their backpedaling when the Armageddon doesn't occur.

  David Cross

  Funny, Humor, January

  "David Cross: The Pride Is Back". TV Special, September 18, 1999.

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• I know Dave [Attel] and we're friendly, and I have nothing but respect for him.

  David Cross

  Friendly, Dave, Knows

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I'd like to think that I'm not just making the point that I'm an atheist over and over, but that I explore different facets of religion. There's no way of bringing up religion without sounding like an asshole.

  David Cross

  Atheist, Thinking, Different

  Interview with Adam Bulger, www.believermag.com. May, 2008.

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• Sketches have characters, exits, entrances and are vastly different.

  David Cross

  Character, Different, Exit

  "David Cross From Arrested Development". Interview With Daniel Robert Epstein, www.suicidegirls.com. February 1, 2004.

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• I'm concerned about how and why there is no gun control.

  David Cross

  Gun, Gun Control, Concerned

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

  4 Copiar cita

• That's what social media is, that's what Twitter is, that's what Facebook posts are. It's just really anti-intellectual.

  David Cross

  Media, Intellectual, Social

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I'm a professional comic. Whether you think I'm funny or not, that's, again, subjective.

  David Cross

  Thinking, Comic, Subjective

  "David Cross on why his comedy tour pissed off people right and left". Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. August 18, 2016.

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• I really don't have a problem with gay marriage... because I'm tolerant and rational.

  David Cross

  Divertido, Humor, Gay

  "Last Laugh '05". TV Movie, December 11, 2005.

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• I went to a bunch of marches in New York and Washington, and you know I believe in the cause, but to march with those people takes a lot of compromise on my end.

  David Cross

  New York, Believe, People

  "Let America Laugh". Interview with Dan Hoyle, www.alternet.org. January 1, 2004.

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• Lo que está haciendo el presidente de la aerolínea es instar a todo el mundo a ceder sus millas de viajero frecuente para los niños enfermos... Pero mientras leía esto, había dos asientos vacíos a mi lado. ¿Por qué los niños enfermos no pueden sentarse allí? Si tanto les preocupan los niños enfermos, ¿no deberían tener un corral de niños enfermos junto a la puerta de embarque?

  David Cross

  Funny, Giving Up, Reading

  "David Cross: The Pride Is Back". TV Special, September 18, 1999.

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