Harriet Lerner Quotes About Apology

• Pide una disculpa cuando creas que la mereces, pero no entres en un tira y afloja al respecto. En lugar de eso, sé un modelo a seguir y ofrece tú mismo una disculpa sincera cuando se la merezca. Tu disposición a disculparte puede ser contagiosa y sirve de modelo de madurez para tu pareja. Además, tu pareja que no se disculpa puede utilizar una forma no verbal de reconectar después de una pelea, rebajar la tensión o mostrarte que se encuentra en un nuevo lugar y quiere reparar una desconexión. Acepta la rama de olivo como sea que te la ofrezcan.

  Harriet Lerner

  War, Believe, Apology

  "Waiting For An Apology? Don’t Hold Your Breath" by Harriet Lerner, www.huffingtonpost.com. January 5, 2012.

• There are some things for which there is no apology, and on the question of slavery, there is no adequate apology for ripping people out of their homeland and bringing them here in chains. There is no adequate apology for the ongoing horrific legacy of racism.

  Harriet Lerner

  Apology, Racism, People

  Fuente: www.elle.com

• Before modern feminism, stories of female ambition were silenced or erased; even now, they are told with apology ("Yes, it's a great honor to be a Nobel Prize laureate, but really, what I love best is staying home and being a mother to Kevin and Annie").

  Harriet Lerner

  Mother, Home, Ambition

  Harriet Goldhor Lerner (1993). “The Dance of Deception: Pretending and Truth-Telling in Women's Lives”, Harpercollins

• It's true that over-apologizing interrupts the flow of conversation and irritates the person who has to stop and offer reassurance, like, "No, it's fine, don't worry about it." But far greater than the challenge of toning down unnecessary "sorrys" is offering an apology when one is due.

  Harriet Lerner

  Apology, Worry, Challenges

  Fuente: www.elle.com

• Ser capaz de presentar una disculpa sincera -una que diga: "Sí, lo entiendo; metí la pata. Tus sentimientos tienen sentido, y me lo tomo en serio" - es la base del éxito en el liderazgo, la paternidad y la amistad, así como de nuestra propia integridad y autoestima. ¿Y no disculparse? Incluso una buena relación sufrirá en silencio, porque realmente lo sentimos cuando alguien no se responsabiliza de lo que ha dicho o dejado de decir.

  Harriet Lerner

  Integrity, Heart, Responsibility

  Fuente: www.elle.com

• I'd say that while it's normal to long for an apology, if you really need it, you're not ready to speak to whoever harmed you. Non-apologizers tend to walk on a tightrope of defensiveness above a huge canyon of low self-esteem - they just can't listen to anything that's going to set them off balance. So focus on what you say for your own sake, because you need to hear your own voice telling the truth.

  Harriet Lerner

  Apology, Long, Focus

  Fuente: www.elle.com

• The best apology, I think, was from my husband, Steve, who slept with a close friend of mine decades back, when we were committed to being life partners but not yet married. And many of the factors that made Steve's apology so healing are universal. One important thing is that he confessed to the affair, rather than my discovering it. He looked deeply into his own history in terms of why this happened, but he never used that history as an excuse.

  Harriet Lerner

  Husband, Healing, Apology

  Fuente: www.elle.com

• Si estás casado con una persona que no pide disculpas, no te servirá de nada exigirlas obstinadamente. Algunas personas carecen de la autoestima necesaria para asumir la responsabilidad de sus comportamientos poco honorables, sentir remordimientos y ofrecer una disculpa sincera. Y muchas personas son tan duras consigo mismas por los errores que cometen que no tienen espacio emocional para admitir su vulnerabilidad y disculparse con su pareja.

  Harriet Lerner

  Mistake, Self Esteem, Responsibility

  "Waiting For An Apology? Don’t Hold Your Breath" by Harriet Lerner, www.huffingtonpost.com. January 5, 2012.

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