Stephan Pastis Quotes

• Whenever I see people with their collars up, I'm tempted to point it out to them like you would for someone who has a food stain on their shirt or food in their teeth, as if to say, 'Your fashion sense is so offensive I'm assuming it's some sort of accident you'll want to fix.

  Stephan Pastis

  Moda, Personas, Quieren

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• I recently forced myself to read a book on quantum physics, just to try and learn something new. I was confused by the middle of the first sentence and it all went downhill from there. The only thing I can remember learning is that a parallel universe can theoretically be contained on the head of a needle. I don't really know what that means, but I am now more careful handling needles.

  Stephan Pastis

  Confused, Book, Mean

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• When you can't draw chameleons and you can't draw blenders, it's a bad idea to write strips where chameleons become blenders.

  Stephan Pastis

  Writing, Ideas, Blenders

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• I seem to be able to get away with pun strips if I add a panel at the end where I somehow indicate that I know it's a bad pun.

  Stephan Pastis

  Able, Add, Ends

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• It's best to love your family as you would a Siberian tiger-from a distance, preferably separated by bars.

  Stephan Pastis

  Distance, Bars, Love Your Family

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• Sticking to my schedule, Ive gotten over seven months ahead, which allowed me to write a Pearls Before Swine movie script for the big screen.

  Stephan Pastis

  Writing, Seven Months, Schedules

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• If somebody is not on the same page with me humor wise, I can't give them that.

  Stephan Pastis

  Wise, Giving, Pages

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• Cuando estaba en la Universidad de California en Berkeley, asistí a algunas clases en las que debía de haber más de cuatrocientos alumnos. Casi siempre me sentaba en el fondo del auditorio para poder leer el periódico. Recuerdo que un día me quedé hasta tarde para hacer una pregunta al profesor y, cuando llegué hasta él, lo único que pude pensar fue: "Así que éste es el aspecto del profesor".

  Stephan Pastis

  Thinking, Class, California

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• I was a lawyer for 10 years, and when youre in law, things really have to get done, or somebody sues you. Its a great trick.

  Stephan Pastis

  Years, Law, Done

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• The writing is done on the computer, and the drawing is done by hand. I write, write, write, then I hit the illustration.

  Stephan Pastis

  Writing, Illustration, Hands

  "Stephan Pastis: When I was a lawyer I was drawing all the time, even in court". The Guardian Interview, www.theguardian.com. November 18, 2014.

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• Soy muy duro con los agentes inmobiliarios. No sé muy bien por qué. Tal vez sea por cómo llaman "encantadora" a cualquier casa pequeña y "estupendo arreglo" a cualquier casa destartalada. Por una vez, me gustaría que me enseñaran una casa y dijeran: "Esta es una mierda".

  Stephan Pastis

  Running, Real, House

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• When I say 'friends,' I use that term loosely, as I don't actually have any.

  Stephan Pastis

  Use, Term

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• Brits have a better sense of humor in most ways. It's darker, more cutting.

  Stephan Pastis

  Cutting, Way, Sense Of Humor

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• Repeats are the absolute soul-crushing killers of the comics page.

  Stephan Pastis

  Crush, Soul, Pages

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• Most poetry just confounds me. I really want to like it, but I can't help thinking it's a hoax. (p. 24)

  Stephan Pastis

  Thinking, Want, Hoaxes

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• Si un restaurante ofrece lápices de colores, siempre los cojo y coloreo durante toda la comida. Es mejor que hablar con la gente con la que he venido a cenar.

  Stephan Pastis

  Color, Talking, People

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• If you put me in South Park, that audience is going to fall asleep in five minutes.

  Stephan Pastis

  Fall, Parks, Minutes

  "Cartoonist Stephan Pastis cast aside his career in law to put Pearls on the comics page" by Peter Hartlaub, www.sfgate.com. September 16, 2005.

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• A stand-up comedian faces the audiences and gets their immediate feedback. I hide behind the comic strip, and unless people write to me, I dont know what they think.

  Stephan Pastis

  Escribir, Pensar, Personas

  4 Copiar cita

• The phrase 'I just turn on my monkey and it makes me feel good' sounds very dirty, but I can't explain why. It's great to try to use expressions like that on the comics page. People want to complain but they can't, because they can't figure out quite what they should be complaining about.

  Stephan Pastis

  Dirty, Expression, People

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• My wife Staci made me go to a wedding last weekend...If it weren’t for her, I’d be happy.

  Stephan Pastis

  Weekend, Wife, Lasts

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• If you're from a certain generation, you basically learn to read with 'Peanuts.' It's sort of the template for the modern strip. Its influence ceased to be noticed because it's in everything.

  Stephan Pastis

  Generations, Influence, Peanuts

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• I don't like drawing characters facing right. If I tried to do that at a book signing, I'd have to pencil it first.

  Stephan Pastis

  Book, Character, Drawing

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• Basically, I learned to read by reading 'Peanuts,' just wanting to know what they were saying.

  Stephan Pastis

  Reading, Peanuts, Knows

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• You can write a little and can draw a little, but there's necessarily a limitation on both in a comic strip, since it appears in such a tiny space.

  Stephan Pastis

  Writing, Space, Littles

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• We need more cartoonists to truly retire when they retire, and not run repeats.

  Stephan Pastis

  Running, Needs, Retiring

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